A Day At The Beach!

It’s the summer holidays and today we are going to beach.My name is Mia by the way. I have a little sister called Lola a mum and a dad.We set of at 9:15am.We got there at 11:31am finally!The beach we went to was Caister,it has lots of sand dunes so we could have a great adventure.Once we spent two and a half hours at the beach the weather changed we were all deverstated.

5 thoughts on “A Day At The Beach!”

  1. Hi Lola,
    This has happened to me before. It might be a lovely day leaving home and by the time we get to the beach the weather would have changed – much to the disgust of all.
    Good work this week.
    Mrs Boyce

    1. Hi Lola it’s me Aston

      Your work is really interesting and exciting but you do have a couple of mistakes next time just read your work and cheak it the it will be the best it can be

  2. Hi Lola

    Your work was really good I especially like the use of your adverbs.
    You do have a couple of mistakes maybe you should check your work before you post it.

    Lily May

  3. Hi Lola,
    Great story!! I loved the word deverstated. You could add some description.
    You just forgot a word when you put ‘ today we are going to beach’I really like the story!

    From Sammy-Jo & Sophie
    At FBPS

  4. Hi Lola,
    It’s a really good piece of writing and you have put lots of different ways to describe it. Well done, but I think to improve next time you could use a range of longer and shorter sentences.

    From Olivia
    At Friday Bridge Primary School

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