One day I was in town looking for clothes for my interview next weekend. I went into New Look and found some nice,purple high heels. Then I went into a cafe to get some cake and a hot chocolate. After that I went into Next to see if I could find some clothes to wear for my special interview. I found a nice black skirt and a nice dark purple top. After I payed for my stuff I went out of the store to find people that looked liked ghosts. They were very creepy. I decided to go home now.
2 thoughts on “Disappearing Shoppers!”
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Natalie,
I really liked how when you were discribing the high heels and the skirt you used vivid vocabulary. Also I liked your transitions that you used when you were explaining were you were going.
Wow, Natalie! Fantastic job clearly describing the events in the story! I could picture the narrator walking around the city, and then finding unusual ghosts there. It was a great way to change the mood of the story. Also, great work using powerful verbs to help enhance the story. Excellent job!