The lost dog happy ending.

One day, Emma and her dog Fluffy were walking in the park, and they were heading  into a play area, there were two other kids in the playground so Emma let her dog off of his leash, and he ran off like a bullet and he chased arfter the two  children, “no Fluffy bad dog,” then fluffy came back whimpering, “sorry fluffy I know it’s hard ,” and the puppie went and jumped over the gait and then the dog got swept from above it was the dog patroll and then Emma started to wave at the helicopter stop thats my dog and she went to the dog patrol station and couldnt find him the shop keeper . to bee continude

 

 

4 thoughts on “The lost dog happy ending.”

  1. Tobias,
    What a great phrase: ‘took off like a bullet’. I can envision that clearly as I have had experiences like that myself. I was looking for the focus phrase …it came down the drainpipe….but it was not in your piece. Had the focus phrase been in your piece, I would have nominated you to be showcased. I will check back soon for your future writing.
    Keep writing.
    Mrs. G., Team 100, Guilderland, NY, USA

  2. Great job on your post because it was really interesting and I really liked it. But next time I would watch your spelling because you’d spelled to be continued wrong.

  3. Dear Tobias,
    I like how well you used a simile to describe your dog taking off in the story. I also liked how you used dialogue in the story. I would suggest adding more capitalisation and punctuation, as well as incorporating the prompt more. Overall, your story was great!

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