MY GOLDFISH

As I heard my mum it was time, time to get my goldfish I had been waiting for this for ages. We got in the car my car is massive  car  so we have to use a ladder to get in our car. We drove so fast, it was like we flew there. Then we walked slowly into the shop my eye glanced at a brown gold fish it was beautiful I said to my mum ”PLEASE,PLEASE,PLEASE CAN I GET IT”  and then my mum said ”ok whatever” we rushed in the the car and drove so fast it was like we flew home.

4 thoughts on “MY GOLDFISH”

  1. Hi Poppy,
    I enjoyed reading your story. Well done.
    Wow – I’m impressed by the size of the car – needing a ladder to get.
    The boys in my class would love that!
    I’m glad you got the goldfish you wanted.
    Good work this week.

    Mrs Boyce (Team 100WC)
    Cork.
    Ireland

    https://mrsboycesclass.100wc.net/

  2. Poppy C I loved it, that story is brilliant. The first sentence sounds like something bad is going to happen but you were actually getting a goldfish!

    From Amelia B

  3. Hi Poppy! I really enjoyed your story. One thing that you did really well was you described how big the car in the story was. Yesterday, I watched a movie with a toddler named Poppy. Overall I really liked your story but one thing that you can work on is adding in more descriptive words to make it more fun and interesting to read. You did a great job, keep up the great work.
    Megan in Illinois

  4. Hi Poppy,
    What a delightful description of a dream come true! The rush, the impetus, the strength of the inner motivation overflowing on the external acts of the characters!
    A simple wish, tenderly rocked in one’s heart may suddenly unleash all its hidden force to search and find in the realm of reality!
    You are future driven, Poppy, and your joy is contagious!
    I’m teacher Ines, from Portugal (Team 100)

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