The snake that chased the cycler

Once upon a time there was a boy  who was called Harry and he was a very good BMX biker he always went the skatepark . He was always the best one there when he went to do a trick on the ramp everyone would move out the way to let him do it. He does frontflips backflips double frontflips double backflips one time he got chased by a snake. Its amazing its mind blowing its eye popping how he does his tricks at five o clock he would look at the time before he could home by the way he has a red bike which is cool THE END!!!

 

3 thoughts on “The snake that chased the cycler”

  1. Hi Lennon! I like how you wrote vivid words for me to get a clear image of what was happening. Great job!

  2. Lennon,

    Great job I really liked how creative you were all throughout the story and with the title. I was wondering by how many tricks you said he did if you Ride a BMX bike too?

  3. Hi Lennon,
    I think your piece was really cool. One thing you could do is use better punctuation and more elaboration on the words. Did you know that snakes can do tricks? How did you come up with the idea? Was it because you love BMX bikes or have one? One thing you did really well was your spelling and keeping it the same tense the whole time.

    Have a nice day!

    Elyssa in Illinois 5rc
    Make sure to check out my blog!

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